Fureau no wa Itami Dake
by xXxDeadOnArrivalxXx
Summary: Sasunaru! Life as a ninja is hard, the two boys find comfort the only way they can.


**Disclaimer**: I own none of this. Not even the title. I got it from the ending theme song to Loveless XD (SoubixRitsuka 4eva!) 

**Warning**: Mention of violence though I suck at fighting scenes so no actual fighting. Some mild angst I think, or more than mild . . . who knows! And some boyxboy (SasukexNaruto) lovin! -does a happy dance-

**Pairing**:...didn't you read the warning!

**A/N**:...I don't think I want to apologize for this one, I like this story damn it! Sorry no modesty here, I like how I wrote this one, a lot . . . a WHOLE lot. XDD -ish feelin peppy-. And sorry if it's confusing, one part of what's going on is like flashbacks to what led to them . . . interacting XD And sorry for the gammar issuses,I have a Beta, a really nifty one even, butI lost her e-mail addy,I thinkI deleted the folderI was keeping her e-mails in -sobs- If you're out there, please e-mail me or i'm gonna start putting up posters for a lost beta XDD

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Fureau no wa itami dake

(Touching Each Other is Merely Pain)

((I think XD))  
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Key:

"Speech"  
'thoughts'  
XXxx(etc.) Scene change

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"So you're really sure about this, Naruto?"

The blonde looked up at the other boy, steady coal eyes gazed at him but he knew better.

Uchiha Sasuke was shaking.

The boys' hands were resting on Narutos forearms and he was leaning half over the blonde in their tent, Naruto, who was having trouble swallowing around a large lump in his throat, nodded. The air in the tent was thick, gaining weight with every misplaced kiss Sasuke gave the blonde below him.

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The last fading sounds of Kunai connecting echoed through the thick forest as another body fell, the ground on which four people stood was seeped in blood, the crimson color overpowering the green grass. The smell of death was heavy on the air, not a sound echoing save the heavy breathing of the ninja.

"That's all of them?"

Sakura looked to Kakashi and nodded, the logical part of her mind taking over, switching her from the scene of the battle, there was no time for sentimentality when you're a ninja.

"Y-Yes, that's all that were in their group."

"Good, spread out and search them for the scrolls."

At once Sakura nodded and the two started their search of the slain bodies. However, as both fought to keep the battle, which had been quick but fierce, from their minds they didn't notice the other two members of their team standing a little away.

Naruto stood stock still, looking down at the blood soaked ground under their feet, there was so much of it, even more than the last time. He'd killed four ninjas today, ninjas who had their own dreams, friends, families and hopes . . . to Naruto they had been only a mission. He was quiet as he stood staring, simply trying to fight back the wails dying in his throat.

"...There's a lot of blood this time . . . "

Sasuke beside him nodded, his hands still holding a bloody kunai. He silently stared at the blonde beside him, Narutos tanned yet fair skin was caked with the blood. It didn't suit him, in fact the image in itself was disturbing. They had killed before of course, they had killed and would do so again when called for. It was their job . . . but they were only 12 and 13 . . .

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Sasuke removed Narutos pants, having disposed of his shirt and jacket before hand. His skin was smooth and his figure lean, he could feel the heat pouring from the small boy the excitement of the undiscovered territories they were reaching, and boundaries they were crossing. Leaning down Sasuke kissed the soft skin, his lips ghosting over the young boys flesh, nibbling lightly before lapping at the mark. Narutos neck was already boasting the purple-ish marks as Sasukes hands traveled the boys chest. His nipples were small, Sasuke ran his fingers over them, moving down more to take one in his mouth and suck. Naruto put a hand over his mouth and muffled a purring sound.

"..D-don't hold it in, Naruto..."

The blonde looked down at him but nodded, moving his hands lower to tangle in Sasukes onyx locks. Leaving his hands to abuse the spots on the boys chest Sasuke leaned back up and moved closer between Narutos legs.

"Do-Ann!..Do you know..what you're doing?"

Sasuke took the question seriously, he knew sex between males was different, but not really the finer details...

"More or less...do you want to stop?"

Naruto shook his head, no hint of hesitation, he was scared, and he knew it was going to hurt...but he wanted something, anything to drive away the other pain. The pleasure he felt from Sasuke had driven the thoughts of having killed so many because he was told to. He knew this wouldn't be necessary for long, soon they would become numb to it, but for now, it was painful.

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They gathered the scrolls and piled the bodies, everyone remaining silent as Kakashi performed the seals and burned the remains. Before the bodies were naught but ash Naruto had returned to the camp, his excuse being he wanted to get cleaned up. Sasuke remained with Kakashi and Sakura, he wasn't sure he could handle seeing the bright happy boys light dimming more. He'd noticed it a while ago, every time they had to kill someone Naruto would close off part of what made him Naruto.

Sasuke had long ago become numb to death, walking into certain parts of his house made him feel overcome with the knowledge of just what happened in those rooms. The stench of death still hung thick to him though he was sure it was just his imagination. He had lost that innocent part of himself...but watching it happen to Naruto...it didn't really seem right. Kakashi had the same numbness Sasuke did, they both knew and understood death, almost too well. Sakura seemed in denial of it, that was probably just a way of making it okay. In fact in most of the ninja you met in Konoha it was all too apparent that they had been forced to grow up too fast.

He sometimes wondered why they chose to become ninja then. He knew his reason, and he could do it. But someone like Naruto...he was strong, but Sasuke wasn't sure he knew just how many dead bodies would have to pave his road to Hokage.

"Lets get back."

The two teens nodded and followed Kakashi back to camp, Sakura already chirping happily in his ear about a job well done.

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The heat in the tent was almost suffocating as the boys fought for breath, ruffling of sleeping bags against the slick nylon of the tent coupled with the heavy breathing belied the boys activities. Naruto was tensed up even as Sasuke told him to relax.

"Naruto...I can't get in if you don't relax..."

The blonde nodded, his arms locked around Sasukes shoulders as he closed his eyes and forced himself to calm down. It was difficult, he had been told by Kiba just how bad doing it with a guy actually hurt and wasn't looking forward to volunteering himself for that pain. But it was with Sasuke and physical pain was a lot better than what he would be struggling with otherwise. Naruto forced his body to calm and Sasuke took that as his cue.

"Mmmnnn!"

Naruto latched onto Sasukes shoulder with his teeth, wanting to give back a little of the searing pain the boy was giving him. It hurt so bad, incredibly bad, even thought Sasuke had stretched him and used that hand lotion to make it easier. However as the white hot pain raced through his backside he felt his mind go numb of all thought and emotions save the pain of being filled by the Uchiha. It was heavenly. There were no scenes of battle, no memories of screams the men let out before they died. There was nothing.

Sasuke had his eyes closed as well, his body welcoming the pain and pleasure, pain from the sharp canines in his shoulder and pleasure from being inside the smaller boy. He was almost all the way in now, taking it slow because he knew pain was pain but he didn't want to be brutal to the boy.

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They made it back to camp, three tents of standard green marking the sleeping place of the group. Sakura was still smiling and chatting, her voice grating on Sasukes nerves more than usual, which was a lot. Trying to tune out her voice Sasuke looked for the splash of color in the brown and green world around him, thankfully he spotted it. Bright golden hair and outrageous orange clothes, now devoid of any blood, thankfully.

Sasuke went over and sat beside him, washing the blood off his arms and face, he didn't get much on himself thankfully, but what little did get on him was making him feel ill. Naruto didn't look at Sasuke until the boy had gotten the blood off, having to wet his hair with the heated water as well. However once he was clean Naruto looked over at him, his face still showing the sad expression from before.

"...The mission is over...right?"

Sasuke nodded, taking off his shirt which would need changed and ignoring Sakuras girly squeals only hearing her shout about having to get new water and hurrying off into the trees. Sasuke stood and went toward his and Narutos tent, the two were forced to share a tent on most missions because it was easier carrying three than four. Sasuke didn't mind for the most part, he usually liked having someone that close after a mission like this. He kind of figured Naruto felt that way too.

He went to his bag and grabbed another shirt, noting by the shadows on the tent walls that it was going to be dark soon. The idle thought brought comfort and Sasuke tried to lock on it, keeping his thoughts away from sad Narutos, fierce battles and death. However as he went to slip on his new shirt the tent moved and he turned, seeing Naruto had come in.

He didn't know what made him do it, and probably never would, but what he did know was that one moment Naruto was standing, looking like he was going to never be Naruto again. And the next, Sasuke was hugging him, both boys locked in an embrace they didn't know which started. Sasuke rested his head on the mop of golden yellow spikes and Naruto had his cheek on Sasukes chest.

They both knew that this night, sleeping nearby wouldn't be enough.

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With both boys unfamiliar with this and with most acts of intimacy, it didn't take them long to reach a climax, the two rocking in an unsteady rhythm toward their pleasure. The pain had receded for Naruto giving way for the pleasure Sasuke brought him with every thrust. The bite mark on Sasukes shoulder was bleeding but didn't hurt as he too was being blinded by a pleasure neither boy had known before.

Naruto clung to Sasuke, his voice coming in shallow pants as he let the tears flow from his eyes, uncertain just why he was crying but thankful that he was locked with the Uchiha. Through blurry eyes he looked up, smiling softly once he caught the expression he was sure no one had ever seen before, Sasuke with his head thrown back gasping in pleasure. The sight kick-started his heart once again and he was eternally grateful to the older boy, his mind repeating the words to himself as he slipped over the edge of pleasure, tensed boy arching up into Sasuke.

'He's alive, and I'm alive...and it will be okay now...'

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It was a hour or so later when Naruto came back to consciousness, his vision impaired by the darkness surrounding him. He was in his own sleeping back now, having had almost no energy to even slip on his boxers before collapsing in his side of the tent. Sasuke was on his own side as well, there would be no after sex cuddling, no sweet words exchanged before they slipped off to dreams of one another. They were not lovers, they had not made love or even had sex, seeking neither love nor pleasure from the act. They had comforted each other and they would probably do it again, the act was painful but preferable to the thought of curling up with the knowledge of how hard life is.

After the nights events only a few words had been spoken afterwards, before the two boys had a chance to pass out from exhaustion.

"Thanks, Teme."

"No problem, Dobe."

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-Owari-


End file.
